If you’re stuck behind me, don’t take your hand off the wheel to text me a nasty message. One raised finger will do.


Here’s the good news....

My friend Barbara Grace says I drive too slow. (She’s been stuck behind me a few times around town.)
My three sons also say I drive too slow.
So do the drivers in the line of five or six cars stuck behind me. 
Well, to be honest, I can't really hear those drivers, but in my rear view mirror I can see them sticking up a particular finger. 
I assume that’s a message to me.
I know folks who will drive 75 miles an hour for 20 miles down the Casey Highway to go to Sam’s Club to save money; I have friends who will clip thousands of coupons to make car trips to 13 different stores to save money.  With the price of gas, I fail to see how those trips save money.
About three or four years ago, I started driving 5 to 10 miles per hour under the speed limit no matter what road I was on.
I got disgusted with the gas prices....remember it tipped over $4 a gallon?  I was being ripped off — and I won’t be ripped off!
I found that if I drive 5 miles per hour under the speed limit, I only get to my destination about 10 minutes later than I did when I drove at the speed limit...but I save a few gas dollars!
I also resolved to make fewer car trips.  My rule is, “Don’t get in the car unless you absolutely have to.”  I try not to let the car out of the garage on weekends.  So all my driving is basically job-related.
My drive into work used to takes 30 minutes.  Now it takes 40 minutes.  They didn’t lengthen the road. 
I drive slower.
My driving habits make me a ‘Patriot.’  I’m saving the drivers stuck behind me lots of money.  They should thank me.  I also believe I’m saving lives; driving slower is safer.
I don’t own an ‘iphone.’
So if you’re stuck behind me, don’t take your hand off the wheel to text me a nasty message.
One raised finger will do.

And that’s The Good News.

Tom Fontana has been editor of the Carbondale News since 1992.